It's a Bitch Getting Old

Normally I like to blog something on Monday but it’s been a tough weekend for me so I had to delay it until today.

Southern Illinois has a 20 plus year tradition of an event called River-to-River Relay. It’s an 80 mile distance from the Mississippi River to the Ohio River, in which 8 runners run approximately 3 mile legs throughout the distance. Each runner will run three legs. The distance may not sound intimidating, but the fact that it is spread over a long time period AND it’s incredibly hilly causes some major distress.  Each runner carries a  baton and then hands it off to the next runner.  The exchange zones were a pretty exciting area on the course.

Runing 10 miles in a day isn’t a major problem.  At one time I was quite the long distance runner. But age has crept up on me.  Thirty years and 40 pounds later (at least I still have my hair!) running is still enjoyable but a much harder task for me.   I must be careful not to overdo my workouts…occasionally my knees ache, but I still occasionally have the competitive juices flowing–especially in an event such as this.

One must first picture being in a van with 8 other people (7 other runners and one driver) for up to 12 hours.  First, the odor becomes overwhelming.  Fortunately it wasn’t an unusually hot day, but nonetheless people still sweat.  The accumulation of 8 sweaty runners  in an enclosed place for up to 12 hours made even a Port-A-Pottie as an pleasant experience.

Second, we are running through some major rural and wilderness areas.  But I gotta tell you…there were some parts that I was wondering if we would see the Deliverance Banjo boy playing…some of us couldn’t get a cell signal–not surprising…some of these places probably didn’t even have land line capability.

Altogether there were about 250 teams…the start was staggered from 6:30 am to 8:15.  Our starting point was 7:45…not bad…BUT we had to finish in 12 hours and 15 minutes (8:00 pm) to qualify for a t-shirt. We had to GET a t-shirt.  Imagine every shape, conditioned and style of runner and they were here.  We had a team of ladies wearing tu-tus.  We all called them the ‘tu-tu’ team (yes we are very clever in the names we give our competitors).  There was a team of pregnant women–nobody wanted to be passed by one of those runners (after all we are guys with some egos).  There was a guy that sounded like a rooster…I kid you not.  He was at every relay exchange making rooster sounds when somebody handed off their baton.

I ran three legs…the first one was just three miles…but the first mile was uphill.  By the time I got to the top I was in such oxygen debt that I couldn’t recover the remainder of the two miles.  I was dog tired when I finished and I had serious reservation whether I could even do the other two.  The humiliation of not running my other two legs was just too intense.  Plus, the rule of the van was that if you didn’t complete your legs you couldn’t drink any beer when it was done.  Enough said…I’ll finish my other two legs.  I decided that I would start extra slow for the next leg (about 4 hours away).

The route of my second leg was relatively flat and true to my plans I started slow and progressively picked it up.  I felt tired but comfortable during this leg and was already planning my third leg…the dreaded downhill component.  Prediction of rain never materialized during the day EXCEPT during this particular leg.  It was a nice rain though but I was pretty soaked when I got through.

The third leg was about 3.35 miles with about a 1.25 mile steep downhill section…just what my legs needed–the pounding of a downhill for over a mile.  I can’t complain though.  The previous runner had to run UPHILL 2 miles…I get the baton and for the first mile I am on level ground and I’m carefully monitoring my pace (I didn’t have a watch with me but I think it was around 4:45 mile pace–I may be off on that time a little).  The downhill was an opportunity for me to ‘let it fly’.  At that time the rain started again (once again only on my leg).  I do the downhill stretch pretty good…catch a guy that was far ahead of me, and I started the last mile of a series of short up and down stretches.

The last 800 miles was uphill and I struggled but was able to push to the exchange zone to hand off to the last person.  The chants of my teammates helped…”beer…beer…beer”.  I was pretty spent after that leg but I felt that I had run well (considering my age and weight).  We piled back into the van (not a good idea for a person finishing a run to do–but we did it after every leg) so we could meet our 8th running at the finish line.

We managed to finish at EXACTLY 12 hours…we BEAT the tu-tus and the pregnant ladies.  Most importantly we got those valued t-shirts.  After celebratory hugs, photos, and adult beverages we climbed back into the van for the 90 minute drive back to Carbondale.  Fortunately we had a woman who was our driver throughout the entire day so we didn’t have to worry about paying attention or staying awake.

The next day I went out for my daily run…I looked like the Arte Johnson character of the 1960s TV show Laugh-In.  I’m sure people who saw me thought I escaped from some sort of asylum.  My legs felt like cement.  I felt 30 years older…but hey, I had a new t-shirt.

Time to start thinking about next year’s relay…